Inviting Mahmoud Ahmadinejad to appear at speak at a top American university was never going to go down well. Inviting him to speak at Columbia University, in New York City, was the height of stupidity.

That’s the same New York City that counts amongst its inhabitants almost two million Jews that Ahmadinejad wants to wipe off the map, and was the target for the 9/11 terror attacks that Ahmadinejad has asserted was perpetrated by the US government.

But, just to make sure he goes home even more unpopular than he arrived, he pushed the boat out that extra bit further. Other than decadent Americans and conspiratorial Jews, I wonder who else the Iranian President hates. Oh, yeah…

In Iran, we don’t have homosexuals like in your country. In Iran, we do not have this phenomenon. I don’t know who told you that we have it.

The evil tyrannical dictator doth protest too much. Or, if you’re more Simpsons than Shakespeare: “Nice man. I wonder if he’s gay.”

It came as a response to a question regarding the execution of Iranians - in total, 200 this year alone - amongst whom were homosexuals, who may or may not (or, put another way, were) executed for being gay.

Now, I don’t know who the heck taught young Mahmoud to debate in school, but he (or she, but it’s Iran, so he, otherwise she’d be stoned to death) should have told him never to accept the premise of an opposing argument. So, Mahmoud, strapped to argue that homosexuals aren’t stoned to death for the way they’re born, decided to attack the premise: by arguing that homosexuality doesn’t exist in Iran.

Yeah, I’m sure the decadent Western gay epidemic hasn’t spread to Iran. After so fully failing to understand history and geography, Ahmadinejad has decided that he would be even cooler if he flunked science, too. Oh, wait, that already happened. Boy, little Mahmoud must have been the coolest kid in the playground.

Having a world leaders conference at Columbia was a good idea. The best and most important universities in the world - a group to which UCL belongs - deserve to host the best and most important speakers. Sadly, Ahmadinejad was clearly not the best speaker, nor would he be particularly important were it not for the fact he’s making nuclear bombs behind the bike shed.

Rewarding him for his crimes, and those of his predecessors and compatriots, by giving his ideas the oxygen of publicity, is not acceptable. Except, of course, when his ideas are so f***ing stupid, that we can laugh at them, and hope the oxygen just allows that kid to burn up before he grows up to do something really stupid. Oh…